TWAS THE MONTH AFTER CHRISTMAS
Twas the month after Christmas, When all through the house,
Nothing would fit me, Not even a blouse!
The cookies I'd nibbled, The eggnog I did taste....
At the holiday parties, had gone to my waist!
I remember the marvelous meals all prepared:
The gravies and sauces, the beef "nicely rare".
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese,
And the way I NEVER said, "No, thank you, please."
As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt,
And I prepared once again to do battle with dirt,
I said to myself (as only I can),
"You can't spend a winter disguised as a MAN"!
So---away with the last of the sour cream dip,
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip!
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished,
'Til all of the additional "ounces" have vanished!
I won't have a cookie, not even a lick!
I'll want only to chew, on a celery stick!
I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread or pie,
I'll munch on a carrot, and quietly cry.
"I'm hungry...I'm lonesome..and life is a bore
But isn't that what January is for"
Unable to giggle, No longer a riot!
HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD DIET!